Evil Envy
by IantoIStheBEST
Summary: Doof get jealous of a more evil villain. and Perry the Platypus needs to prove to Doof that he is the most amazing evil scientist ever. cause he is. he is also my role model, which is probably why I'm not ruler of the world yet, but I'm getting there, I'm getting there! slight perrysmirtz if you squint. Love IantoIStheBEST xxx
1. Chapter 1

Evil Envy.

"See guys. See! It's cool, yeah. Completely evil." Whined the hunched figure in the lab coat, he was around 6 foot 2 but seemed shorter. His hair stuck out in all directions; now slightly burnt after his gadget backfired making him smell a bit like a bonfire. He was Dr. Doofensmirtz. Evil mastermind soon to be ruler of the world, well as soon as the judges of dragons' den (the evil version) realised how evil he was and give him a huge budget to use.

"I'm sorry but it just isn't evil enough." Stated the judges as one. Dr. Doofensmirtz sighed, slumped even further and sidled out of the room, back into the waiting room.

"Woah. Did it explode in your face? Harsh." Called out a very high pitch voice. Dr. Doofensmirtz sighed.

"No it didn't. It was a burn-inator but the target system went wrong. So take your soda powder volcano and but out of my business, kid." Replied Dr. Doofensmirtz finally turning around to reveal the speaker. Taller. Larger. Older. And stronger. Dr. Doofensmirtz realised these things when he was suddenly hoisted a foot of the ground

"Who are you calling kid?" replied the speaker, continuing in the high pitch voice.

"I'm ssssorry. Yyouu jjjjust sounded a bbit like a kiddd." Stuttered Dr. Doofensmirtz.

"I'm no kid. I am Professor Praiseworthy, but I legally changed my name to the Regurgitator." Cried out Professor Praiseworthy, who legally changed his name to the Regurgitator. Who then also threw Dr. Doofensmirtz in to the wall. And through the wall. And the next one and the next one.

"_Well I should really introduce myself. I am Agent P, otherwise known as Perry, and yes I am a platypus. I am also Dr. Doofensmirtz's nemesis, it is my job to stop his evil plans, but they usually are soooo bad they self-combust. Well back to the story. By the time Dr. Doofensmirtz got back to his house, I mean evil lair…"_

"That was ridiculous. I mean how did he throw me through quite so many walls? And why was there so many walls all lined up like that? Seriously. Norm, where are you, you stupid piece of junk?" Dr. Doofensmirtz sighed. He slumped onto his purple couch and turned on his purple TV, he decided to stay home in his purple lair.

"_Hey, Perry the Platypus! What are you doing here? And what can I say? Purple is my evil colour. And what is with the commentary?"_

"_Oi! This is my show so move it. I'm simply following orders by documenting what you do over the next week. Anyway, as you found me I might as well thwart you, so get out of my narration!"_

"Ok let's start then. Ummm." Dr. Doofensmirtz shifted nervously from one foot to the other. "Oh yes evil plan. This, Perry the Platypus, is my incinerator…-inator. It is mark two of my burn-inator, and this time I have checked and double checked and triple checked… well you get the idea; the target system works. And the first thing I am going to do with the incinerator-inator is to incinerate you! Mwa ha ha ha. Mwa ha ha…" Dr. Doofensmirtz broke of his evil laugh in a coughing fit. "Sorry Perry the Platypus. I got a fly in my throat. Stupid laugh." Perry smirked.

"_Oh yeah. Did I mention that I can't speak outside the narration? Well I am a platypus. And I am typing this if you are wanting a way to understand you pets._

"Don't smirk at me Perry the Platypus. Sheesh, peoples' manners nowadays. So I will use my incinerator-inator and burn anyone who I don't like, starting with you and then that guy this afternoon, seriously Perry the Platypus, you wouldn't believe how many walls he threw me through. He was called Professor Praiseworthy who legally changed his name to the Regurgitator, if you were wondering." Perry sighed, shrugged his blue shoulders and stepped forward towards the incinerator-inator. Bam! A cage sprung up around Perry. He sighed again. "Do you like the trap? I brought this one on the internet. Cool yeah, cool." Dr. Doofensmirtz bounced from one foot to the other in excitement. "See, see. Anyway to complete my evil plan I need to find the base slash lair of Professor Praiseworthy, who legally changed his name to the Regurgitator. To, you know, zap him. So you sit tight Perry the Platypus, I'm going to research him on the internet." Dr. Doofensmirtz sat down on a purple swivel chair and started typing on his huge computer. "So: P-r-o-f-e-s-s-o-r-space-P-r-a-i-s-e-w-o-r-t-h-y-space-w-h-o-space-l-e-g-a-l-l-y space-c-h-a-n-g-e-d-space-h-i-s-space-n-a-m-e-space-t-o-space-t-h-e-space-R-e-g-u-r-g-i-t-a-t-o-r. Search! Oh look, only one result. That strange, Perry the Platypus, there is usually a lot more than one." Dr. Doofensmirtz shook his head. And clicked on the link.


	2. Chapter 2

Evil envy II

At that moment the incinerator-inator decided to incinerate itself and most of Dr. Doofensmirtz's flat/lair.

_Anyway, after the destruction of Dr. Doofensmirtz's lair I followed him to the house of the supposed; Professor Praiseworthy, who legally changed his name to the Regurgitator. It looked like a top secret science base. Which it probably was guessing from the iron-y tang in the air surrounding it, highlighting the usage of bombs and other weapons. The base itself was silent, personally for me; it was too silent and was bearing all the hallmarks of a trap. Dr. Doofensmirtz, being his usual idiotic self, walked straight up to the cast metal door and knocked._

"Hi, is anyone in?" asked Dr. Doofensmirtz. He knocked again.

"Use the doorbell!" called a high pitched voice over the intercom.

_Professor Praiseworthy, who legally changed his name to the Regurgitator, if you remember from earlier._

"Oh, ok." Dr. Doofensmirtz pressed the button, which caused a bunch off missiles to appear, aiming menacingly at Dr. Doofensmirtz. "Well that's just rude, seriously. How do you get all this stuff anyway?" The door slid back and to the side with the customary sci-fi hiss of hydro-cylinders.

"Well my dad runs the dragons den, the evil version. So obliviously I win, every time." Stated Professor Praiseworthy, who legally changed his name to the Regurgitator, in a snooty voice.

"So you're not a better evil villain than me. You just have more money… well then. Dr. Doofensmirtz is out, peace!" Commented Dr. Doofensmirtz. He then turned on his heel and walked off.

_Good he worked it out in the end. He can be a bit slow at times and man am I going to get an earful tomorrow when I go to thwart Dr. D's evil plan for the day. And we all know that Dr. Doofensmirtz is the best evil villain ever, he just needs to work on his planning skills._

_Signing off, Agent P, aka: Perry the Platypus._

**Sorry about the abrupt ending. It was originally an English homework but somehow, with the names changed, it magical fit to Doof and Perry. Peace!**


End file.
